The Light of Hope

I just heard a song that brought back some beautiful memories but before those memories there was much pain and sorrow. A long time ago when I was a teenager I went through a very painful process of failure and loneliness. There just wasn't any way around it, due to circumstances and the uphill battle that faced me. As I contemplated suicide there was a song that gave me solace, a moment of peace, a breath of fresh air. I would listen to the song more than was even possible, I was sure I was wearing the song out! Amazingly enough the song was literally the wind beneath my wings, it kept me afloat. I cannot tell you how precious the song was or what it did for me as a human being but it shaped the course of history, well my history that is!

As time had passed the pain had subsided and I went on a journey with my girlfriend to YWAM (missionary trip) Surprisingly enough who did I meet? I met the parents of the singer who wrote and performed the song that had literally saved my life! I told my story to them and in turn they mentioned it to their son. The world is smaller than we think and how we inspire others is much bigger than we can imagine. Here I am going through another moment in my life, trying to survive a stroke that literally has decimated my dreams and hopes. Now don't be discouraged by my circumstances, there is a way for inspiration to grow. I am not afraid as I once was, of life, of the unknown. I am now running to make change in peoples lives and bring hope and inspiration to others and to myself, challenging the borders of what I can or cannot do.
The most important thing is this, I am free!! I am not alone and I will run in victory!! Don't loose heart, you are worth the fight. Take one step at a time and breath.

Dream a little dream

Now for most of us there is that still small voice that questions whether we can go beyond what we think is possible or at least what limits we have dictated to ourselves. Now there is something odd about running, something tangible. You set your distance and you simply try to make it to the finish, you either make it or not. That in itself is undoubtedly truthful, there are no lies to figure out or deceptive ambitions or what have you. It is just you and the road! I love running because it tells me like it is, nothing more or nothing less. Amazingly, that truly inspires me, maybe its inspirational because I have something that challenges my mind, body and soul. Yes, I definitely said soul, the reason is simple, it affords me the time to contemplate and learn to evaluate what is of true worth in life.
Just recently I ran 31kms with a new found friend and some old ones too. What really blew me away was that we all had a common goal, we wanted to run the distance that we had set for ourselves. I felt honoured by those who ran with me, who wanted to believe in what I was doing. I wish I could dig deeper into the pool of contemplation but maybe the mystery of it all should be left in silence. I just know that there was something new I learned about myself and those who went with me. There was camaraderie and a sense of purpose, we all wanted to make a difference and we knew that we would! I loved every minute of it because I knew before hand that it was something worth cherishing. It was precious and so I held it tight to my heart.
We often go through life so quickly and demand that it serve us with utter respect but when the tables turn we can truly realize that we ought to be the ones who pay respect. For me laughter is one simple way to live in the moment, to love the moment, to embrace the minutes that pass ever so gently through our hands. God requires us to admonish his gift of life not to abuse it, so I want to embrace it without hesitation. I want to climb every mountain of fear and shout from every hilltop! I don't want to live in a tiny box of "What ifs". I want to soar above my dreams and kiss reality. Reach for the stars and embrace heavens warmth! When I came to the last few kms in my run, I felt my heart pounding and my flesh became weak but never was there a greater moment when my soul cried out for victory! When I felt the hand of Gods grace carrying me, not because I deserved it but simply because He loves me. I hope you will be encouraged by this letter and maybe you will find some strength in challenging your fears. Like I always say "Give it your best and when that is gone, give it your all!"

God Bless....my fellow runners and those yet to join!

Map for Way Of The Dove Run

There are so many feelings and thoughts, maybe even fears that permeate this event. First of all it is my heart and soul that sits in the middle of this run. I just never imagined that when I had the stroke, this is what would come of it. Looking forward at the great unknown and standing at the edge of my fears and hoping that God would divide the waters of impossibilities. I mean He did it for the israelites, then He sure can do it for me. There is always the unexpected or the unknown when we step out of the box of comfort. Well in my case there was no comfort, in the box or out, so why not just go for it?! Why not lead a life worth living?! I mean, thousands of people everyday just go through the motions, not really knowing who or what they really are. What they are made of! I am at the edge of something beautiful, maybe not, the one thing I know is that I am here in this moment. Willing to climb beyond what I can take. I want to live a life worthy of victory. I am willing to bleed that hope, that monumental moment of change!

We all want to live beyond the borders of complacency in some way or another. It is when we step out that we really find out who we are. In just a few days I am going to step out of a dream and right into reality!! I am scarred and I am excited. I can almost taste the finish line!! Now that almost all the planning has occurred it is simply time to put the feet to the pavement of success. By Gods amazing grace I hope that this will happen, I know it will because I have people who believe in me, who are praying for me and I have people who are running with me. One of the most amazing gifts are friendship. Running a literal race with people who are willing to sacrifice their time and their bodies to the cause is simply beautiful.
I will soon be standing among champions, people who wish to live beyond words! I will be standing among the fields of wonder and clouds of dreams! This is the moment I have been waiting for. Bringing hope and love! This stroke hasn't seen nothing yet!!

Take it or leave it

     Now in life there are ups and there are downs, it's a given. Just like the sunshine and the clouds, we expect them because it is a part of nature. Well in life it goes the same way, it's not all lollipops and laughter. Imagine one day you woke up to a splitting headache or a terrible flu. It is usually in those moments that you realize how appreciative you really are. The fact that on healthier days you can laugh as loud as you wish or that you can walk to the bathroom knowing that, well you get the idea; its a normal routine with an expected outcome. You pretty much do everything without difficulty until that storm hits. Like a boat on the ocean, the waters become unpleasant and now you are fighting with everything. When I arrived at home from the hospital there were so many memories of things that once was as easy as smiling or laughing. They were natural causes of a life filled with less difficulty than the one that I was facing now.
     Here I am looking at the hallway and thinking " Man, I used to walk down this thing like it was going out of style!" Well maybe on a good day that is what still happens but every now and then my brain goes into another world and I have to fight tooth and nail. Hey, we all go through something that makes us realize that suddenly we need to be more thankful for what we really have.
     I was just thinking of all the people who go through harder times than I and I wonder. I wonder how their minds deal with the tragedy of loosing a dear loved one, or maybe finding out that they might have cancer?! There are many probabilities that could occur but the greater question is simply this. What am I thankful for?
What do I have? Who am I really? Those are all powerful questions and rightfully so, they are the foundation for failure or victory! Maybe you face a wall of broken dreams or a mountain of heartbreak, maybe you are wondering am I living a life worthy of praise? What I mean is this, is your life a story of victory and triumph or is it covered in regret and failure? In my opinion, there is enough for anyone to falter over if they look for it but to imagine being more than who you are, living beyond your fears, now that takes talent! Why live in a small room with no windows?! I want to run in the open fields of grace and mercy! I want to be a champion!
     So here I am, standing at the door of a new dream, waiting for my big run. I have worked through the pain, the tears, the seizures and all the garbage that has come with running long distances for a stroke survivor, I am here to live my dream, to be an inspiration to all those people who feel that they have lost their own! I want to prove that impossible is just a word and nothing more! I used to take hope for granted and laughter as just a moment but they no longer mean just that. They are the lifeline to success!

Jeremiah 17:7
"But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. 

Shifting Sands

     With both my hands I reached into the sands of time, looking for those faded memories that once burned bright in the morning sun. They danced, they played among the fields of wonder. Well that was where I once was. I could imagine the soft touch of my babies hands, the laughter, the giggles and so much more. I paraded my emotions, my love for my family with such elated joy. It was a simple time that only required little effort, that was a time of sand castles and beautiful oceans filled with hope.
     Somehow from those luscious fields of beautiful colours that once embraced my eyes with mystery now sit barren. The seasons can change within the blink of an eye. The sand castles have tumbled and the wind has changed. When we face insurmountable odds, we are left to a world unknown, possibly burdened by fear and confusion. It is in those very moments that we need to see the bigger picture, the landscape from afar! I can either be crushed by the waves of injustice or I can create something beautiful out of something less than perfect. The world will hand you only what it has but what you do with it can literally cause others to marvel! When you build a sand castle you get water,sand, a bucket and a shovel. There is nothing more to be required of you except your ability to imagine! Now that is the most important part, because you see without your imagination nothing can be created, at least nothing beautiful.
     I am on this earth for but a short time but let me tell you something, I am going to use what I have and I am going to make something beautiful. I am going to live a life worthy of laughter, worthy of joy and no amount of pain or sorrow is going to take that beautiful gift away....

Fearless Wonder

     Now before I go and see if another pile of possible supporters say yes or no, I must tell you something that I have noticed. I have invested so much of my time in running and training that I realize that there is too much to just let go. I have overcome so much not to let things just fade away for no purpose. What I mean is this, when you put your heart,sweat and tears into something you become committed. You run the race until the very end, you don't stop and you definitely don't take "I QUIT" for an answer. 

     You pull every ounce out of your soul, that special place that drives you to believe beyond words. In the process somehow in some small way, the journey that had you bound for failure has taken a monumental shift! You are now opening your eyes and when fear looks you right in the face you just smile, you begin to nod with hope and reject the possibility of ever succuming to failures silence. Your voice becomes stronger and your actions lead by example! Then in that very moment inspiration births a hero, a hero that longs and lives for victory! Now I attribute that wonderful birth to a God of grace and wonder. I hope that you will take that very simple step and begin to believe. You may think that it is just a small insignificant task that will lead to minimal results but just imagine for a moment you decided it was otherwise!

     If you took a moment and captured a dream worth chasing and just like a ball that rolls down a hill, watched that momentum gain fervency. You would really be surprised! I am... Will you,will you begin to believe and take a journey worth fighting for?! I am going to live my life with reckless abandonement, bleed my passion into a world filled with colourless words. I want to live a rainbow of wonder and learn to fly! 

Am I what I think of me?

From the ground of grass

to the dirt I see

am I more than hollow words

or shallow seas

loose but one single smile

falter under weakened knees

the pain will bleed

the roots shall whither

mighty the wind

fallen

fallen

fallen leaves

crush my hands

pierce my head

in my wound September bleeds

in my wound September bleeds

but for loss I will not gain

not a single brush

to err the painters name

I will grow like the trees the same

to live beyond the seasons glow

for life shall I live

under Gods holy name

By EvK

Sometimes in life things are not what they appear to be, you need to look a little further or wait a little longer. When we first see a tree in its barren state we don't know the beauty that it holds until it blooms. I mean I could imagine it with all my heart and mind but it doesn't do justice. Not until I get out there and feel it, touch it, smell it; listen to the wind blowing through the leaves as the birds sing melodies of life. You see, life can be more than just a drop of water. It can be a fountain of laughter, love and music. Gods greatest melodies sing gently, whispering love in every colour and  in every sound.